The next morning at the Brown Hotel, an exhausted Drew receives a phone call from Claire, who explains that she has decided to forgo her Hawaiian vacation in lieu of helping sad Drew through his time of presumed distress. With that, Claire emerges from the background and surprises Drew by putting her hands over his eyes. Also, Claire mentions that her friend has given her a videotape.

Drew and Claire embark on a montage in which they shop for an urn, aided by Drew's voiceover explaining, "We are shopping for an urn." Claire also takes the opportunity to snap another "photo" of Drew holding an urn and a small American flag. Their tour of Kentucky continues into a vast cemetery, where they giggle and frolic to a pop song suggesting their increasing intimacy.

That evening, the couple strolls through the empty streets of Elizabethtown. Drew's attempt to compliment Claire is greeted with insistence that she doesn't want an "ice cream cone," which she defines as a compliment that is sweet but melts quickly. Claire quickly mentions that someone named "Ben" is coming in tomorrow, and explains her theory that she and Drew are "substitute people." With this nuanced level of flirtation, Drew and Claire nearly share a kiss before deciding to remain friends.

Due to their proximity, Louisville clearly maintains the same temporal illogic as Elizabethtown itself, as Claire has apparently taken the Space-Time Continuum Expressway back to the Brown Hotel: if this scene takes place the following morning (also the day on which Drew was once supposed to "get back on that bike"), the viewer is asked to accept two scenarios:

1. Drew, after a quick stop in Elizabethtown to yell at his mom in front of Uncle Dale, Bill Banyan, and Charles Dean, booked it to Louisville so he could wander aimlessly around the Brown Hotel lobby instead of getting some sleep. Obviously, Drew had no interest in sticking around to help plan his own father's memorial service.
2. Claire has already returned to her Nashville apartment, removed her red hat, and driven 181 miles back to Louisville just in time to ambush Drew in the lobby. (Once again, the alternative -- that Claire has been tailing Drew since bidding him "Aloha" -- is no less disturbing.)

Claire's distinctly sociopathic behavior takes another dark turn in this chapter, as she hovers in the hotel shrubbery to spy on Drew answering her call, followed by a loudly popping balloon as a method of revealing her location. One wonders if Claire employs similar techniques on her passengers, whereby she pops a balloon behind a sleeping man's head before inquiring, "Would you care for peanuts or crackers?" As Claire physically obscures his vision with her hands, the symbolism is clear: Drew has no idea what he is getting himself into.

Back in Elizabethtown once again, Drew and Claire's romp through the Urn Emporium reveals that this is not just any urn shop. Among the dowdy blues and traditional golds, an urn reading "KISS Forever" graces the shelf and leads us to wonder whether the director has any sort of passion for music. Perhaps Cameron Crowe should have gone a step further in inserting himself into the scene, and introduced an urn called "Say Urnything" which features two arms holding a boom box over its lid.

After lavishing her quirky love of life upon the Urn Depot, Claire's propensity for dancing on graves makes the inevitable leap from figurative to literal. This is only logical for a character whose relationship with death is so closely linked with pleasure and merriment, as the viewer can only conclude that Claire is responsible for putting most of Elizabethtown in the ground; indeed, from the perspective of a woman who hasn't slept in days, takes fake pictures, and instinctively believes that all Ellens are evil, this cemetery must amount to a large outdoor trophy room.

We also note that Drew and Claire's delightful montage includes a visit to Colonel Sanders's grave, located at Cave Hill Cemetery in Louisville. As the Urn Warehouse is clearly located in Elizabethtown (betrayed by the flagrant quirk of the young man behind the counter), it appears the prospect of leaving condiment packets on someone's grave was worth the 50-mile drive.

Drew and Claire's brush with romance later that evening is obviously misguided, as it is only the film's second act and the couple is not yet allowed to be together. Still, Drew is able to communicate his unfamiliarity with girls like Claire, though her response ("I'm one of a kind!") is somewhat undermined by her previous declaration that she and Drew are "substitute people." In fact, while Claire explains at length her extraneous role in Ben's life, her desire to file Drew under this damning label is never explained.

"Now we actually have a shot at being friends. For the rest of our lives."
"I am not attracted to you."

"We're substitute people."
"We're unmemorable even to each other."